Is Valentine’s Day Only for Romance? Or, a time to keep our connections alive?

For many adults, Valentine’s Day is fraught with emotions that are difficult to contain. It’s a day haunted with spirits: ghosts of exes past, the shadow of a lover not yet arrived, a dark tale of undefined disappointment. For those who are coupled, it may inspire an expectation that our partners surprise and delight. On the flip side, partners may experience anxiety from a debilitating pressure to perform.

Time is a social construct, yet each new year brings an opportunity to define one’s intentions. What would happen if we committed to de-romanticizing this romantic holiday? Welcome, Valentine’s Day, you are a reminder to exercise gratitude and honor connectedness. May we find in you an annual moment, in which we appreciate ourselves and our own abilities—but also pay tribute to the pillars in our lives that hold us up.

Self-love begins with a check in. A simple, mindful scan of one’s wellbeing. Are you protecting yourself, exercising compassion for yourself, and defining what you want? A solid sense of self can build the foundation for strong bonds with others. Allow yourself to reflect: who are the others who matter?

Our support circles are multidimensional, and each member serves a different function. But we know, intimately, who occupies our safe spaces. These people may know your past or offer hope in your future. They may share your humor or offer the freedom of peace in their presence. Verbalizing appreciation to our loved ones creates currents that keep our connection alive. First give love to yourself and second to those who keep you strong, on this Valentine’s Day and always.